Love Month Blues

Growing up as a Christian, I was always told either “wait for the one God has made specifically for you” or “Jesus needs to be your lover first.”

I can’t say I’ve had Jesus as my primary lover throughout the course of my life. Regardless of my flaws, He has always loved me yet I still feel lonely a lot of times. I crave the love of a physical companion. I won’t blame it on any thing else except the mere fact that I am human and created to love.

My love month blues have nothing to do with God’s love for me because that love never fails. It does have to do with my lack of patience and getting into relationships that for some reason always seem to fall a part and never fails to hit me in the month of February repeatedly. Personally, it’s more a month of heartaches than any thing else.

This year, I decided to not let myself wallow in my sorrows and do something different. I bought half a dozen roses and chocolates for my mom, sent cupcakes to the guy I’ve been crushing on and gave roses with chocolates to the people who have been great encouragements in my life. To tell you the truth, it felt so much better to give on Valentine’s Day than to receive. I thoroughly enjoyed the huge smiles and the phone calls of gratitude I got. The opportunity to make someone smile and feel special really turned everything around for me.

I realized love isn’t about what you get. It’s about what you give. ❤

Flowers for my Mama

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